New Novel Available on Amazon & Kindle “Chaos: Where Do You Go When You Run From Yourself?”

Widowed by war, gay scientist confronts tragedy in novel of love, hate

After losing his partner, Mo Alavi faces a group bent on eliminating homosexuality in Terry
Pinaud’s “Chaos: Where Do You Go When You Run From Yourself?”

BLOOMINGTON, Ind. – Terry Pinaud warns that “Chaos: Where Do You Go When You Run From Yourself?” (ISBN 1475072791) is not for the faint of heart. A story of love and hate, readers follow Mohammed “Mo” Alavi, a transplanted Iranian research doctor in America, not long after he loses his partner Aden Birch, who was in Iraq fighting in Operation Desert Storm. Against his better judgment, Mo has accepted a position at Cook County General in Chicago. The organization is headed up by Dr. Steven Wong, a nationally renowned virologist who has a secret agenda to eliminate homosexuality.

A war widow, an immigrant and now a doctor working for a man who thinks his sexuality is an abomination, Mo begins to lose his mind. The collusion of tragic events has pushed him to the brink of insanity. He can no longer differentiate dreams and memories from his physical reality. There are times when Mo can’t figure out if he is in a bar in Chicago or if he’s somehow in Louisville where he met Aden. The lines even begin to blur when it comes to his character. Is he a healer or a killer?.

In despair, Mo turns to Jack Finch, a Chicago police detective. But everyone’s help comes with a price and agenda of its own, and his relationship with Jack is no different. Jack has a back story that Mo must confront, if he is to survive his own terrifying ordeal. As Dr. Wong’s organization heats up its campaign to terrorize those it deems unworthy, the novel builds to a blistering conclusion.

“Chaos” is a brave and daring novel that doesn’t shy away from controversy, with its frank dialogue and explicit sex scenes. Powerful, blunt and convincing, the novel’s dark events illustrate the raw reality of people consumed by their fears and passions.

“Chaos: Where Do You Go When You Run From Yourself?” is available for sale online at
and other channels.

Author Interviewed on Local Radio

IU School of Optometry Atwater Eye Care Center optometrist Khashayar Tonekaboni aka author Terry Pinaud talks about the intricacies and inspirations of becoming a novelist and highlights his soon to be released 5th novel “Chaos.” Rally for Equality organizing committee member Eric Sharp provides updates about the “Equality for all Hoosiers” rally (against the anti same-sex constitutional amendment) scheduled for Monday 14 March in Indianapolis. Helen Harrell highlights Jane Adams on an edition of Queer Herstory. Gay men’s group IlluMENate director and coordinator of upcoming Health Summit Patrick Battani stops by with more organizational and conference updates.  Featured artist is NYC out hip hop singer/songwriter and actor Lester Greene.  Musical selections are “Russian Roulette” and “Homeless” from Greene’s new cd.

Listen to archived show…


cover_hopeHope is about guilt. Hope is about regret. Hope is about parallels, parallels because we are all human. And Hope is about realizations and a little salvation. Ultimately, Hope is about a little light that can exist in all of us to help us find the way. It’s about a mystery of a missing girl, but the real mystery is learning to heal a little, to forgive oneself a little-even at a terrible price.

Orchard Grove, Maine: Poor, coastal fishing town, close to Boston. Nine months of the year, the town languishes and hides, but come summer, the natives are restless. The town attracts New York and Boston high society to the exclusive and luscious Pointe-Morel Estates on its outskirts. Money pours in, opportunities present themselves, hopes run high, and love and lust run cheap. But this summer is different because Hope, the town’s favorite daughter, is missing. It’s up to the smart but volatile newcomer detective to find her. Is there a connection between Hope’s disappearance and the tourists? Can it be that simple, that trite? Detective Aziz and his colleagues have very little to go on, very little other than the barely sensible words and actions of Johnny Netter, a teenager with a developmental disorder. Sad Johnny, sad because Hope isn’t there to play catch with him. He is anxious and agitated. He shrieks and he claps and stomps, but is there something else in his emoting, is there a connection? Is there more than just missing a friend behind the emoting and the humming? Will Aziz discover the secrets? And if so, what else might he learn about sympathy, compassion, fear, guilt, about our prejudices reflected in our actions and inactions-in short, all that is in the makeup of all of us?

* Paperback: 268 pages
* Publisher: Dog Ear Publishing, LLC (February 4, 2009)
* Language: English

Buy it at

Ryder Article

By day, Khashayar Tonekaboni is a clinical assistant professor at the Indiana University School of Optometry. At night, he is a writer of fiction under the pen name Terry Pinaud. “I sometimes feel like a storyteller when I am lecturing to 80 young, eager students—eager until the subject matter becomes so dry that 80 pairs of eyes glaze over, at which point, I tend to become more like a stand-up comedian, grasping at anything to regain the focus of my audience.” Reflections on the writer’s life by Khashayar Tonekaboni. Continue reading

Interview on WFHB

Indiana University optometry professor and author of more than fifteen books and novels Terry Pinaud talks about the techniques of writing, what inspires him, and provides a real glimpse into the mind of a successful novelist. A native of Iran, he also provides an overview of Iranian politics and daily life for some of its citizenry. bOUT2 is a spinoff podcast of bloomingOUT, Indiana’s only out, loud, and proud radio show, a public affairs program dedicated to the gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender and queer community. Each week on bOUT2 we deconstruct the week’s top queer news and talk with guests you didn’t hear in this week’s bloomingOUT. Listen to Podcast on WFHB»

Excerpts from Disposition


Project: Enhance suggestibility of the subject.

Method: Medical extension of coma and amnesia induction.

Purpose: Eradicate homosexual behavior

Subject: Omar Kebalah, an Egyptian teenager from an affluent family, who travels to Evanston to prepare for his future. He is afraid. Coming to the United States is his father’s idea—Dr. Mohammad Kebalah. Omar hides behind nationalism and political idealism, but there is a secret he’s been keeping. Chris Levinson, the host family’s son, helps him unlock the secret. Seventeen, rich, handsome, and invincible, they go on a road trip in Chris’ brand new car. They never reach their destination. Chris and another boy are killed. Omar goes into a coma. And the story has only just begun.


Finch was taking a calculated risk. He had seen something in Ann’s eyes the night he spoke to her in front of the grocery store. She was startled, of course, but there was something else, something that wanted to peer through her desire to control, beyond her elitist and defiant tone. There were tiny sparks of the woman underneath the prominent scientist that wanted to push through, held back only by determination. He had seen the same fear in Ann’s eyes as she was almost fleeing Wong’s office. Finch had also been in touch with Melanie, Ann’s gossipy assistant, who had been very helpful. The death of Ann’s patients had attracted the detective’s already piqued interest. Perhaps this would help the detective break through the icy exterior and get at what was underneath. Continue reading

Reader Reviews for The Parallel Triangle

“I don’t usually have time or sacrifice time to finish a book in later than a week, but this book did the magic. I had a hard time putting it down and going to sleep as I wanted to know how it ended. This has expanded my taste in books!” – Reader Reviews for The Parallel Triangle

“This book was unlike anything I could’ve imagined! The characters were so well developed that you felt as if you knew each of them personally. I couldn’t put it down, and finished it in two days. I became so involved in the story that I even dreamt about it when I finished it. I definitley recommend this book!” – Reader Reviews for The Parallel Triangle